Welcome to my little haven of creative writing, passionate ranting, and thoughtful learning.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Husband and Wife Life

I'm not sure I always show my appreciation, but I very much love married life. And mostly for the little things. Like this conversation we had the other night before falling asleep:

Me: "Did you set an alarm so you're up for work?"
Nathan: "Yes."
Me: "Is the volume up on your phone?"
Nathan: "Yes."
*Pause, then Nathan gets out of bed and checks his phone.*
Nathan: "Why do you do this to me?"
Me: "Do what?"
Nathan: "Make me second think myself, I knew I set it."
Me: "Second-think?"
Nathan: "Second-guess. I'm going to bed now."

See, for me at least, early on in a relationship I'm afraid to laugh at the other person, or question them. I don't want to come across as mean, or nagging, or anything like that. But after three and a half years together, Nathan and I have no worries about coming across wrong or building up resentment over little things. We talk about it. I know that if I say something that does bother him, he'll bring it up later and we'll be fine.
Which means we're able to actually be completely ourselves with each other.
And, that means we have these little moments where I get to just laugh at him (or vice versa) and it really does make a difference in the day. Coming home from work to see my best friend? And laugh either with or at him? It makes for a pretty good life.


Monday, May 20, 2013

Rescuing Wildlife

I'm a bit late in posting this, but a few nights ago I went out with a friend to get some dinner, do a little shopping, and just get a night out before I start working 50 hour weeks. It was a great night, but at the end of it I was saying bye to Alex at her car, looked over at the car next to hers and saw a baby robin. I wasn't sure if it was a baby at first or just a small bird, but when I walked up to it and it let me pick it up, it was clear it was a baby.

So, I looked and couldn't see a nest or hear any other birds, and I couldn't just leave the poor thing in the middle of the Richmond Center parking lot, therefore it came home with me.
I called Nathan on the way and he did some research. Apparently if you ever find a baby bird you are supposed to feed them canned cat food. Beef is best.
It worked!

For two days I fed Mr. Robin, including getting up in the middle of the night to feed him, and finally the wildlife refuge sent a runner to come pick him up since they would be much better able to care for him. On one hand, it was kind of sad to see him go because he was so cute. But on the other hand, it was really a relief because I have so many other things to care for at this point. And the closer we get to the pool opening the less time I have for all of these little dependents! I'm still glad I brought him home though, otherwise the thought of him being hit by a car or meeting another tragic end would have haunted me.


Sunday, May 19, 2013

Persistence. More persistence. Almost success!

As most of you already know, Nathan and I have been planning to buy a house.
Now, our first experience renting was a disaster. We had a bunch of roommates, there was drama and since the bills came out of my account I had to be the person on everyone's case to get the money, and our landlord was, well, unprofessional. When we called because something in the house broke, he was usually out of town and couldn't fix it. Yet would show up unannounced to fix or improve things that didn't need fussed with. It was nothing but a stressful nightmare for the most part.
When we moved into the townhouse we are in now we were pleasantly surprised to find that any complaints that we called in for were rectified quickly. More than quickly, it was done by the next day. However, there were certain sacrifices we had made. We share a wall with a neighbor. There isn't a yard. And the buildings feel as though they are basically on top of each other. For the short-term, it has been perfect. But this is not the place I want to raise my children.
Initially the plan was to move to North Carolina. However, long story, we realized that we would both be happy staying in Kentucky. We LOVE our church, our friends, and the community. Berea is truly a unique place, you can't really understand it until you spend time here. And we have connections here, connections that can help us both further our careers. We can build a great and happy future right here, and that's what we plan to do.
So, with the help of the realtor we were going through in Fayetteville, we found a house here. Not just "a house" the dream house. It has everything that Nathan and I both wanted.
Here were our dream house requirements:
3+ bedrooms
1.5+ bathrooms
an extra room I could turn into a playroom
at least 1 acre of land
room for a barn/stables
not too far from town
front porch

The house that we found:
3 large bedrooms
2 full bathrooms
A formal dining room that I will use as a playroom
2.5 acres of land
A barn with two stables
A front porch that goes across the entire front of the house
An unfinished guest house
15 minutes outside of Berea
beautiful view of the mountains
AND a whole lot else

We went out to see it, twice, inspecting it closely and both of us being able to envision our family growing there. So we started trying to move forward. After dealing with a loan agent who was convinced that she couldn't help us get a mortgage, we found one who was able to approve us in a day. We put in an offer last Thursday, got the details of a counteroffer on Sunday. Sunday night we talked in over and decided to accept the counteroffer. Now we start moving forward with inspections and everything else. If, and that is a very big IF, but if it all goes smoothly we could close and have the keys by the end of June!
It's scary, but also extremely exciting! We want nothing more than to really settle down. I mean, I lived in the same house for the first 18 years of my life. It wasn't until I left for college that I moved, and since then everything has been "temporary." So this permanence would give me some security and peace of mind as Nathan and I continue to grow as a family.


Thursday, May 9, 2013

Being a Mom is Rough Sometimes

I hope that it is clear by now that I really do love my little one. If, through my previous blog posts, you haven't gotten that impression, it may be time to reread :)
However, sometimes I have to recognize how difficult life can be with him. For example, the original plan for this summer was for me to work full time (more like 50+ hours a week) and Nathan would work part time and be able to be home with Jace the majority of the time. We weren't expecting him to be offered a full time job starting the day after graduation. So we weren't quite prepared for what that would mean for us. For example: setting up a babysitter for every day that our schedules overlap is unbelievably stressful.

Now, you may be thinking, why not enroll him in daycare? Yes, daycare would mean I could drop him off, no issues. But I worked at a daycare. A terribly run daycare that cared much more about the profits than the children entrusted to them. The ratios meant that one teacher was left with 6 one year old's at a time and, no matter how good the teacher, this meant that kids got hurt, got bit by other kids, and got ignored. Jace is not a high-maintenance baby, he would most likely be okay, but at the same time, I have been scarred by my experience on the inside of daycare. Plus the germs: both of us were sick so often when we were there 40 hours a week.
Now, I know that there are good daycare's  Even great daycare's  But I would much rather leave him with a friend, with people that I know and trust, or best of all at home when someone can come over to be with him in his own environment with his own toys and crib. Nathan agrees with me: it just seems better to have him in a more controlled environment. But the issue that comes with it is organizing where he goes each day and at what time. See, friends willing to babysit have their own schedules too, they aren't open 7-5 M-F to take whatever child is dropped off. That is where the stress comes in. Once I know my schedule, and Nathan's schedule, it's left to me to figure out Jace's. And when I have worked that day and am stressed out anyway it seems impossible to figure it all out while Jace is crying at me for no real reason. I am hoping that as I get more used to it, or as our schedules become more regular, I will have better luck getting everything organized.
Any other mom's feel this way too sometimes?
Any advice/insight/words of encouragement to offer if so?


Monday, May 6, 2013

A Family of College Graduates!


This has been probably the most stressful week of my life. Last week at the last minute Nathan found out that he was doing badly enough in a class that it might prevent him from graduating college. Terrifying, right?
See, Nathan has a full-time job lined up starting the day after graduation (aka today) and it depended on him graduating. If he didn't graduate, no job. No full time job, no way to get a mortgage. No idea what would happen at the end of summer when my seasonal job would end. So our entire plan, everything that we've worked for and planned out, would be gone.
But wait, two days later we get more news, depending on an essay he may be able to raise the grade enough to graduate. HUGE sigh of relief, work on finals, we can do this!
Nope, essay wasn't enough, but wait, there was an incomplete. If that gets taken care of we're good again. Nope, just kidding, the in the major GPA is wrong because of the one class. Oh, no, wait, we can switch that class to be taken from another perspective. And etc. etc. etc.
Needless to say, we went back and forth between he is and isn't graduating more times than I thought possible in a week. We did not find out until Sunday morning at about 10:30 that Nathan was actually, officially, graduating from Berea College. The ceremony was starting at 2:00 pm. I don't think we could have gotten any closer waiting for the official decision.
But, the stress over, I got to see my husband join the class of 2013 and cross the stage. Against all the odds, we are both in possession of a Bachelor's degree. Despite pregnancy, marriage, the birth of Jace, and the crazy expenses that come with being a family, we both received our degrees in four years (technically a little less for Nathan since he went part time one semester). It feels amazing to have accomplished that together, and now we really do get to move on to the next chapter. 

Nathan lining up in the old gym.

Friends since Freshman year

Walking in

About to walk the stage with Jace

Nathan and Nick

Nathan and Brendan

Nathan and his dad

Nathan and his mom

Nathan and Elise (and Brendan)

My family <3 

To the rest that have graduated, or will be in the next couple weeks, CONGRATULATIONS!
Best of luck moving into your future, and I hope you are so proud of yourself, because it is a huge accomplishment.


Saturday, May 4, 2013

More Like My Mom Every Day

I remember growing up that mom always made us clean the ENTIRE house before guests came over. Every room had to be vacuumed, all of the "clutter" had to be put away, and if they were coming for a meal, the table had to be set just so. It was so annoying!
And I could not understand it. Especially if it was my aunt and uncle coming over. My young thought process, "They're family, why would they care if the house is a little messy?"
Now, however, I am just like my mother. Therefore, I understand her. See, for most of my childhood my mom was a stay at home mom. She stayed with me and my sister and so us and the house were what she had to take pride in. And my mom had a lot to be proud of. The house was always clean: she just wanted it cleaner when we had guests. There were always home baked desserts, home cooked meals for dinner, and the laundry and dishes were always done.
So now, I want to do the same thing. This weekend the hubby graduates college, so all of my in-laws are coming down for the weekend to celebrate and be there for commencement. So, I spent the majority of Thursday, Friday and today up till now cleaning and preparing. Just as my mother did, I wanted to floors vacuumed, the clutter and toys put away, fresh baked cookies on the table, and all the laundry put away. Although I am also working outside the home, my house (technically apartment) is something I want to be able to take pride in.

So my living room floor is visible, even Luna got a bath so she can make a good first impression.

The hallway is clean and clutter free.

Chocolate chip cookies and fruit are on the *gasp* completely clean table!

The sink is EMPTY and even scrubbed down (isn't it so shiny and pretty?)

And, even though I know no one else will be in our bedroom, our bedroom is CLEAN. 

And, it fills me with a sense of pride. I will feel good welcoming everyone into my organized and pleasant apartment, rather than apologizing constantly for the messes that I hadn't had time to handle. Which is what I would have done if I hadn't taken the time to do this. But now, I can feel proud and accomplished, and I can feel more competent as a wife and mom. I love knowing that I have learned to be domestic, and I also know that it came from mom.
True to the title, I am honestly more like my mother each day.
And I think it's an amazing thing.